Adventures in the men's room

Apparently all the washrooms in the city close before the bars do.

I wouldn't know, I don't often go to bars, really. And when I do, I don't usually stay til closing. Or hit the town afterwards. Yet there I was, at 2:30 in the morning, and I needed to pee. Badly.

We were headed for Pita Pit. Finally, I saw it, and took off towards it, ahead of the group. I ran in, and asked if they had a washroom. They said no.

I took off across the street to Subway. "Out of order". Yeah, right. Two more places, nothing. Finally, I head into this pizza place. I had been avoiding it because although at the other places I would have purchased something, I don't eat pizza. I went in. "Do you have a washroom? I'll pay you to use it!" Cards on the table. "You don't have to pay - but only the men's room is open." I tell him I don't care, and take off to the back room. I close the stall door behind me, and hear someone else come in. Great. There is no way I'm coming out first, because I have absolutely no explanation, and the guy would have to be totally shocked to see a girl storm out of there. Once I'm sure he's gone, I wash my hands, tip the cashier, and I'm on my way.

I make my way back to Pita Pit, where my friends all look at me confusedly because I have been missing for the past 10 minutes or so, but they are all inebriated enough that they are content on just knowing I have returned. I make my way up to the front of the line rather quickly, and realize I have no idea what I want, nor any idea what is even on the menu. I offer to let the girl behind me go first. She looks more confused than me and declines. I try to read the menu quickly. Finally, I say "I don't know... something with chicken.... in wrap form..... no cheese." He rings up God knows what and gives me my total. A friend of mine decides to pay (presumably because I would be driving him home) and I ask, "what did I order, anyway?" The cashier hands me my receipt and replies, "Just give them the receipt - they'll know what to give you". I think no matter what you pay, you end up customizing the pita anyway. Which makes me wonder why there was 30 or so items on the menu, but whatever. I was fed.